Getting out of the hospital…kinda scary

I know I have to start preparing to get out of the hospital, and it’s actually really scary because I don’t have any help at home…for the first time, ever. My ex-boyfriend just left with no notice, right in the midst of some major health problems…and he knew it. He didn’t give me time to figure out another plan. I feel like I was thrown down the stairs.

So I’m scrambling to keep myself going (doctors, medications), and trying to figure out a support system, all at the same time…it’s very overwhelming.

I just keep reminding myself all I can do is take it one day at a time. There are so many holes in my lifeboat at once, I just have to plug them one at a time…filling the worst ones first. That’s all I can do.

Then I have to think about the long term plans..trying to find ways to help contribute. I wouldn’t be on this planet if it wasn’t for my son’s godfather, and I have to find a way to give back. I have to stabilize my health, and then figure that out. Quickly.

This is the first time since I become very ill in 2005, that I haven’t had a support system in place. And this is one of my worst health crises ever…a horrifying combination.

About hopeforanswers

Some kind of rare immune deficiency, yet to be determined. A lifetime of infections without an elevated white cell blood or fever. Very grateful to be alive, very thankful for the friends who’ve supported me and for access to literally millions of dollars worth of medical care. I’m not the bubble child, I’m somewhere in between.
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