My father…a rotten soul.

There is only so much of his bull**** I can take.

I tracked my ‘father’ down back in 2006 in order to try and find answers to my health problems, and he just crossed a line that I just can not stomach anymore.

I’m grateful I was able to get some clues, but most of the help I got was from his brother, my dear Uncle Bobby, who was a kind and sweet soul unlike his tyrant and psychotic older brother.

I just could not stand the charade any longer, and I had to draw the line.

He’s a rotten person, and it was time for me to let him have it.

Begin forwarded message:

From: Tara
Date: July 27, 2013 6:23:10 AM PDT
To: Bill
Subject: Re: money

I think it’s time for you and I to set the record straight on a number of issues.

I called you to tell you about the Facebook stock, only because you were the one who told me a few months ago it was going to go up–and you were right. I made the semi-joke that you should buy some stock for Noah, because in the twilight of your years I thought it might be nice if you thought about your grandson’s future, since you did so little for the future of either me or my sister Shannon.

As you are well aware, I am only on this planet as a direct result of the generosity of others–I live and breathe the air that God gives us *only* because many people make sacrifices for me, mostly notably Joe D****. Without him, I would not be here today.

So for me to make a light joke about Facebook stock, to my father–the man who should have set up a small bank account for me a long time ago and saved a $100/month for my future–a man who brags about all the whores he’s spent thousands on and the money he’s blown on this and that,

is now going to send this obnoxious email about an oft hand remark I made–I comment I made assuming you weren’t going to send any money anyway–just shows the depth of your pathological disregard for my well being since I was born.

I know you have suffered. I know you have suffered more than you let on. I know from Uncle Bobby, who was a kind and sweet soul, that you have had a lot of mysterious health problems that medicine will not have a chance to explain before you’re gone.

I also know that you are extraordinarily brilliant, and got trapped by the pains of these health problems. I think it’s a testimony to your genius that you found a way to support yourself despite your disabled state of being, and the amazing way you mask your pain to the world in a robin hood like success.

I tracked you down again in 2006 to try to find answers to my strange ailments. I remember vividly the monster that you were to my mother, and this was not an easy task. I remember the fights, I remember the bruises, and I remember the cops. My mother, who I have my own issues of neglect, but ultimately it was her and her family, most notably my grandfather David, who sacrificed a lot for me and Shannon to try and provide us a good life.

So for you now–in the twilight of your life–by your own words physicians saying you may only have weeks left to live, to send such a revolting and obnoxious email just demonstrates the lack of regard you have always had for me.

I am not a niece or nephew or cousin–that would be understandable if you didn’t want to help–I am your daughter.

A daughter who is only alive because I am directly supported by the charity of other people, as I am too ill to work.

I would not be alive today without Joe, but that does not make it okay that my parents have done nothing.

Noah would not have a mother without Joe’s support, and you clearly do not have any regard or compassion for the sacrifices Joe makes for me to keep me on the planet. Do you really think Joe wants to keep working? Don’t you think he’d rather just travel around the world on a long vacation?? He deserves it after the stressful life he’s had. He’s put up with so much Hollywood bullshit over the years–bullshit I’ve seen myself–and he deserves a good long retirement

Instead, he’s off working–why?? Because he is trying to keep me alive. Me. Your daughter. That you can’t send $500 for a Facebook stock for.

I don’t know why the angels in heaven brought Joe to me, or why by the grace of god he took on the role of Noah’s godfather. Noah wouldn’t have any real family support without him.

Thank God the role of Godfather has more meaning to Joe than being a father for 38 years has ever meant to you.

Every time I hear someone call Noah ‘David’–and they do at every doctor’s appointment, every plane ride, and every first day at school–it makes me smile because hearing him called ‘David’ reminds me of all the beautiful things he did for me in my lifetime. I only wish I was well enough to have another son to name one after Joe too.

Go fuck yourself.


On Jul 25, 2013, at 5:48 PM, Bill wrote:

hi tara
this is your sick father
STOP CALLING with your problems
STOP CALLING asking for money
u can call once or twice a week to sat hi
otherwise FUCK OFF!

About hopeforanswers

Some kind of rare immune deficiency, yet to be determined. A lifetime of infections without an elevated white cell blood or fever. Very grateful to be alive, very thankful for the friends who’ve supported me and for access to literally millions of dollars worth of medical care. I’m not the bubble child, I’m somewhere in between.
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