The Blood Cultures that Never Were to Be

Wow. This would never, ever, fucking happen in the United States.

After 4 nurses couldn’t draw my blood, they just threw their hands in the air ‘well, that didn’t work out’.

I was just stunned.

My urine came back showing something (of course–my urine always comes back showing something when I’m crashing–),

so then everything just got put into the ‘you have a bladder infection’ category, and any other investigation was completely dismissed.

Positive blood culture? When you look this healthy, without a fever?


I’m so sick right now, I have no idea what to do.

This experience, has scared the living shit out of me.

It’s not so much a fault of the Canadian medical system (though it is a little),

it’s the degree of complexity of my medical.

New doctors, just don’t get it.

And I can’t live somewhere, where every time I’m experiencing something bad, I have to play the getting to know you game.

I can’t play that game. It’s like Russian Roulette. It’s not fair to the doctors or me. A new doctor can’t possibly be expected to digest the complexity of my medical case, and I don’t deserve to sit here so frustrated when I am suffering this much.

I have a really nice male nurse, Sean, and I discussed in depth all of my concerns and frustrations,

“Is there anywhere in this city–ANYWHERE–where doctors communicate with the doctors in the ER, when their patients have emergencies?? ANYWHERE??”

He thought for a second, and shook his head,


Then I am totally fucked.

I’m lucky I have a few week emergency supply of IV antibiotics sitting for me back at the apartment where I’m staying. I can talk with my doctor back in Los Angeles, and come up with a plan.

Wow. What an experience…I’m glad this happened, because it’s been like a bucket of freezing cold water…

(And there is no shortage of freezing water up here.)

If I moved to Canada permanently, I’d be dead within a year. And everyone would be standing around, ‘omg–Tara really was as sick as she said she was–‘

Of course, douchebag.

Of course.

About hopeforanswers

Some kind of rare immune deficiency, yet to be determined. A lifetime of infections without an elevated white cell blood or fever. Very grateful to be alive, very thankful for the friends who’ve supported me and for access to literally millions of dollars worth of medical care. I’m not the bubble child, I’m somewhere in between.
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